Once upon a time when I was at school there was this chap called Hans.
He was a burly brute and he proudly did a monolithic turd of such great magnitude it shut down the toilets for a week.
Someone had blocked the bog with toilet paper. He then proudly crafted his very own Cleopatra's needle which I swear to you was more then a foot long. The circumference at the base was at least 7" which tapered off as the poo ascended skywards with uncanny precision. Everyone saw this "creation" before the area was cordoned off.
The school caretakers refused to tackle the problem. A week later a sort of biohazard environmental team came to make the area safe again.
And did I mention the smell.........Unholy.